Valentine’s Day: A Commercial Scam Or Romantic Highlight?

by Sandra on February 4

It’s that time of year again. You cannot open Facebook or Twitter, walk into a store, or watch TV without being bombarded with pink, heart-shaped everything. Valentine’s Day. Some look forward to it all year, and others just want to hide under the blankets until it is gone again.
There is no denying that it is a very commercialized holiday, mostly created by companies who don’t care much about love, unless it’s love for money.

Is Valentine’s Day really that bad though? Or might there be some good as well?

Why wait for a specific day to show your love?

In a healthy relationship your partner will know how much they mean to you. You won’t need a special day for them to reinforce that. Just like you don’t need a little snowman in your cup of cappuccino, but it’s still fun. And that’s exactly what Valentine’s Day can be about: letting your loved ones know, in a special, non-daily way, how much they mean to you.

It is a great excuse to do something fun, loving and special with and for your partner. You don’t need an excuse of course, but if you have it anyway, why not use it?

Cappuccino Snowman

It is too commercial!

Do people try to make money off Valentine’s Day? Yes. Definitely. No doubt about it. But that is not necessarily bad. Being sold to is a reality of life, and you don’t have to participate if you don’t like it. That doesn’t mean that you have to give up the entire holiday, though. You could make your partner a nice breakfast in bed or a romantic dinner. You could drop the kids off at the grandparents’ and do a “Netflix and chill” day. There are plenty of things you can do to show your love and appreciation without having to spend extra money.

Don’t let the fact that it is a very commercialized day take away from your joy of having that one special day to celebrate love and friendship.

Also very important: on the day after Valentine’s Day, as well as the day after Halloween, all chocolates and heart shaped candy will be on sale. Chocolate and candy on sale is good; therefore, Valentine’s Day is good.

It is only for show!

If you don’t care about what others do on Valentine’s Day, that makes it very simple. Don’t care. You can just do what is right for you and your partner and give them something personalized, even if it is something they cannot really brag about to their mom.

And if you know that part of what makes the day enjoyable for your partner is the bragging next day, why not give her something to brag about? Making your partner happy is what this day is all about after all.

Men have to do all the work! It is not fair!

First off . . . No. No it isn’t. Women are not really expected to give anything to their guys on this day, except maybe to show some physical appreciation for whatever he got her. And he is expected to get her something she really really loves. And flowers. And chocolate. And take her out for dinner.

My point though . . . Does that really matter? In a world where many women buy their own birthday, Mother’s Day, and Christmas presents, have to remind their spouses a 100 times that it is their anniversary . . . is it really that bad that there is one holiday where a guy is supposed to put in a bit more effort?

If you are really bothered by the fact that you are expected to do more than your partner, don’t blame it on the holiday. Blame it on your relationship, and communicate your issues to your partner. If they are right for you, they will put in as much effort as you to show their appreciation.

I have bad associations with Valentine’s Day

The best thing to do with bad associations is to bury them under good ones. Sure, it sucks if an ex dumped you on that day, but is that the fault of your new partner? Should he or she suffer just because someone else was an ass?

If it is something more serious, such as death of a loved one, you can always postpone the day and make it a personalized Valentine’s Day a week or 2 earlier or later.

I don’t know what to get her!

You can find out what your partner wants for Valentine’s Day by asking. I know, it is a very novel concept, but you should try it, because it really does work. If the answer is “whatever you want” or “I don’t need anything” you can ask some different versions of the same question:

“What is the most fun you ever had on Valentine’s Day?”
“If you can pick anything you want, what would you like?”
“What would you hate if I got you that for Valentine’s Day?”
“Is there anything special you want to do for Valentine’s Day?”

If they still say “whatever” or “I don’t care,” call them out on it and tell them that they won’t get anything unless they tell you what they want because it is good to make an effort, but it has to come from both sides.

So: Valentine’s Day: A Commercial Scam Or Romantic Initiative?

I think everyone should celebrate Valentine’s Day. A day for appreciating friendship and love can never be a bad thing. If February the 14th isn’t convenient or you really hate the date itself, then just celebrate it somewhere in July. Mostly, though . . . Suck it up, and make your loved one happy for a day! They deserve it.

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Sandra is a 33 year old mother, wife, life coach. As a Dutch national living in Mexico she is trying to find ways to make most out of life. She’s passionate about simplifying life, yet loves her luxuries and non-minimalistic lifestyle.

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

lya ferrer February 4, 2016 at 10:34 pm

mucho tiene que ver, la costumbre de celebrar o no estas fechas. si en casa no se celebraba ninguna, muy difícilmente las tienes presentes.
me da mucho gusto leer tus artículos.


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